As a kid I was extremely passionate about cricket. I loved watching and playing cricket. I still do but not with the same intensity as those yester years. All my heroes, role models were cricketers. I used to have huge fights at home to get my slot on TV to watch cricket. I used to dream about me raising my bat to a packed stadium or clean bolwing an opponent batsman. I used to relegate my studies, my sleep to back ground to watch a match. The only times I cried as a kid were when Sachin used to get out early in a match. I wept uncontrollably when Sachin got out during the test match against Pakistan in Chennai. I couldnt hold back my tears when South Africa lost to Australia in 1999 world cup Semi Finals.
The only time I ever got hurt was playing the game. I broke my wrist while trying to attempt an acrobatic piece of fielding. I banged by hand into a rusted aluminium door just practising my bowling action and ended up with six stitches. I have been hit on the eye, in the groin, have gone home limping with twisted ankles, swollen knees. Even when I had the broken wrist I still held the bat with one hand and played. For a long time the only news paper pages I read were from the sports section. The only magazine I bought was Sportstar. I used to cut pictures of Sachin and had a scrap book made out of it.Such was the passion I had for the game. It was my life, it was my dream. I always knew that I could never take it up as a career because I knew my talent at the game was limited. But again talent and passion are two different things.
The days on which India Vs Pakistan matches were on used to be much more special. The frenzy used to begin atleast a week before the match. Since those matches were very rare, they used to be savoured more. I used to argue with my skeptical friends who used to think that India and Sachin were no good. Once I even got into a fist fight when some one said Sachin was useless. During the whole week before the match all my thoughts, discussions were full of team selection, what should India do if we win the toss? who will be man of the match? And I could hardly sleep on the eve of the match. During the match itself, you would find the streets empty, you would find crowds gathered around a radio to hear the commentary. Every run used to be cheered, every boundary sent crowds dancing whether at the stadium or at their homes. Fathers and Kids used to be glued to the TVs and moms used to make hot pakodas. I used to go to the temple on the day of the match and pray for a Sachin century. I think when I was a kid I never asked anything for myself from God but I always asked for a Sachin century. I am sure a lot of Indian Middle class can relate to the picture I am painting. The bottom line being Cricket was my religion and Sachin Tendulkar was my God.
Now when some one mentioned that it was India Vs Pakistan match tomorrow. I was like ok. It wasnt even on my mind's radar. I was kinda taken aback at my apathy for the game. This is the game I breathed for 22 years of my life, this was my life's blood. What happened? I think my passion for the game started waning after I got out of Engineering college. Once I started working my interests started to diversify. I discovered my appetite for reading, I was in love with a woman, my thoughts more shifted towards career, what should I do next? whether I should study further or I should work? Does she loves me? The mind was filled with these questions rather than who is going to be the man of the match in tomorrows game. I still used to be glued to the score card on cricinfo refreshing when ever I could, but I guess the change started then.
Its been 5 years since I passed out of college and today I feel I have almost become indifferent to the game. The other day I was watching India vs SL ODI and I watched it for sometime and once Sachin got out I shut the TV and started surfing the net. I dint even know the result until next day some one told me that India had lost the match. I initially thought I had lost that competitive spirit, I some how grew out of this sporting frenzy. But its not true I still watch football and support ManUnited passionately, I love tennis more than ever before. But some how Cricket has lost its favour with me. Is it the reducing attention span with increasing age? or something else? I do not know. But I feel as if I have lost a part of me. The fanatical, passionate, irrationally optimistic me is dead along with my interest for cricket. RIP.
No comments:
Post a Comment